Number of pages: 274
Number of times read (including the time before this review): 1
Rating (out of five stars): 5
You don’t like personal reviews, please don’t continue reading. This was a very personal read for me and I would appreciate it if you could not say anything negative. I would be open to a polite discussion in the comments.
I have never related to a character as much as I related to Elise. I haven’t ever truly related to a book character (which is probably why I don’t read contemporary books often). It’s probably hard to hear this from a girl who has been represented in books when many races, religions, and sexualities are not properly represented, but I have never related to any of the many fictional girls with red hair and green eyes simply because we look the same.
Like Elise, I was bullied as a kid. I was bullied from grade 1 to grade 9. I never had any real friends during those years, so there wasn’t anyone to talk or ease the pain. I kept imaginary friends well into grade 8 out of loneliness, because fake people couldn’t turn on me. It was a sad existence. My past was all I could think about when reading this book. I remembered their words echoing in my head, and I remembered the countless tears that fell. I also remembered how I would not wish the pain these people caused me on anyone, because no one, no matter how cruel, deserves to feel like I did.
I will remember the first and last day I had suicidal thoughts for the rest of my life. It was when I was 12 years old (2011). I was sitting in my room with the door closed, so something small had obviously set me off and I looked towards my armoire, and I thought “how would I kill myself”. I then proceed to go through all the ways I could do it and decided that the only plausible way has to hang myself. Then, part of me realised what was happening and I thought about my parents and how they would fell if they came in and saw me dead at age 12, when I had so much more life left to live. What if my little sister with whom I share a room were to find me? It was terrifying that it had gone that far, and in my fear I walked over to me bookshelf, picked out a book, and began to read.
I had enjoyed reading long before this, but that day is when my love of books truly began. After that day, books were my escape and my savior. Books had truly saved my life. That day will haunt me for the rest of my life, but I am truly grateful for that, because at least it didn’t break my family.
So, I relate to Elise. I had/have the same trust issues after being bullied. I had that little voice inside my head telling me that I’m worthless and that I will never be good enough. I reached my breaking point once. Even her dad feels like my dad (in personality). I am not the same as Elise (I will never do some of the things she has done), but I truly feel as though this book is a very honest portrayal of a victim of bullying.
I think This Song Will Save Your Life with always hold a special place in my heart, granting it 5 out of 5 stars.